Hilarious Workout Dad Jokes to Pump You Up! Fit for Laughs
Hilarious Workout Dad Jokes to Pump You Up!
Fitness for the funny bone
CoreniaBug Dad Jokes on YouTube
"I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode. Like your phone, but without the phone."
Honestly, I don't mind leg day at the gym. It's just the two days after that I can't stand.
I said to the Gym instructor, "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays."
Did you hear about the weightlifting vegetable? He was a muscle sprout.
Why did the blonde get a perm? Because her trainer said curls might help.
Why couldn't the personal trainer get evicted? Because he was squatting.
What happened when the personal trainer brought a lion to the gym? His clients got ripped to shreds.
Why do hamburgers go to the gym? To get better buns.
Why did the fish stop lifting weights? He pulled a mussel.
At the gym, I decided to hop on a treadmill. People gave me weird looks, so I started jogging instead.
There’s a new machine down at the gym today. I used it for an hour and felt sick, it’s great though, got everything, KitKats, M&Ms, Snickers, the lot!
My local gym costs $120 for an entire year. That’s $60 per visit, not a great deal.
Paid athletes bulk faster than prisoners using gym facilities. The pros outweigh the cons.
I invited my girlfriend to go to the gym with me and then I didn’t show up. I hope she gets the message that we’re not working out.
After years of hard work in the gym as a personal trainer I finally admitted I wasn’t strong enough and quit. I just handed in my too weak notice.
Two Chameleons walk in a gym. The first one says, “Spot me, bro.” The second goes, “Who said that?”
J.K. Rowling recently tweeted out that Hogwarts actually has a full gym for wizards to exercise and lift weights. The entrance is called the Dumbbell Door.
What do you call Elon Musk when he’s been to the gym a lot? Muskular.
I got kicked out of my gym in the middle of kickboxing class. Turns out they do not have kickboxing classes.
I went to the gym on my own Accord this morning. I mean why would I take someone else's car?
You know the best part about being the only person at the gym that uses a speed bag? There’s no punchline.
Why do impatient people hate to go to the gym? Because of the weights!
Started going to the gym and I dropped 10 pounds very quickly. Thankfully the dumbbell missed my foot.
What is a banana's best gymnastics move? A split!
I asked a personal trainer, "Do you need to eat chicken to get muscles?" He said, "No whey!"
Why does the trainer at the gym have to keep getting new clothes? Because people keep telling him he's ripped.
I workout religiously. About once or twice around the holidays.
Two Canadian body builders were working out at the gym. After they were done, they sat together in the locker room. One turned to the other and said, "I'm sore, eh?" The other said, "What for?"
Saw a group of bodybuilding priests at the gym today. Talk about muscle mass.
I have been hitting the gym recently. I'm not getting fitter, but my hand is getting darn bloody.
I want to start running twenty four-hour gyms. And they’ll all be open 11-3 daily.
I just signed up for a 12 month membership at a gym. My bank called wondering if my credit card got stolen.
My accountant said I'm crazy for investing all my money in my idea of building a business that offers a boxing gym, a dentist, and a manicurist all under one roof. But I told him I'm going to fight tooth and nail for it. Now if I could just think of a clever name for it, I'd be all set...
What does a bodybuilder do for cardio? He lifts weights faster.
I just saw some idiot at the gym. He put a water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.
After weeks of keeping it secret, I confessed to my gym buddies that I had taken the bench press out of my workout schedule. That was a weight off my chest.
I asked my trainer at the gym if I could start shadow boxing. He said, “Knock yourself out!”
Why doesn’t the fisherman go to the gym? He pulled a mussel.
What did the Christian say to the ladies at the gym? “Hallowed by thy gains.”
Why did the gym-goer get arrested? She killed her workout.
What’s the easiest way to get a six-pack at the gym? Take the beer from your fridge and smuggle it in.
What do you call a gym that’s really dirty? A gymnastium.
I have to make a confession: I’m not bench-pressing anymore. Wow, that took a real weight off my chest.
Why did the couple stop going to gym? It wasn’t working out.
What’s the name of Cardi B‘s super-fit gym-focused sister? Cardi O.
A gymnast walks into a bar… She gets a two-point deduction and loses the gold.
Why wasn’t the gym for ants successful? The owners just couldn’t seem to get the bugs out.
What exercise do hairdressers do in the gym? Curls.
I once knocked a guy off his bike… I’ve since been banned from that gym.
Why did the man get arrested at the gym? He asked someone to check out his guns.
Why don’t you see many haunted gyms? Everyone inside is exorcising.
What do chickens work on in the gym? Their pecks.
A peephole was found in the gym locker rooms. The police are looking into it.
Why did they open a gym in hell? So you could exercise your demons.
Friend No. 1: Why do you like going on night runs so much? Friend No. 2: The added fear of being murdered really does wonders for my cardio.
I started using this new machine at the gym. But after an hour, I got really sick. It had everything though: chips, Oreos, the works!
Why did the Uber driver cancel his gym membership? Because he didn’t even Lyft, bro.
It was a real pain canceling my gym membership. They made me hand in a too weak notice.
What’s it called when a rapper goes to the gym for 20 minutes? A Lil Pump.
Treadmills get you nowhere.
Some priests started a bodybuilding group. They have a lot of muscle mass.
Why was the farmer get kicked out of the gym? He was destroying his calves.
A man walks into a gym and asks the receptionist, “What machine should I use to impress women?” She responded swiftly, pointing outside the door, saying, “The ATM machine, sir.”
What is the bodybuilder’s version of cardio? Lifting weights faster.
Did you hear about the pumpkins that went to the gym? They wanted to become jacked-o-lanterns.
A gym junkie is counting loudly in the gym as he does bench presses. “1! 3! 5! 7! 9!” Says another gym-goer, “Do you even lift, bro?” To which the gym junkie replied, “Nah, I only lift odd, bro.”
Why doesn’t Waldo (from “Where’s Waldo?”) go to the gym? Because no one can spot him.
What’s the best gift you can give to a gym addict? A mirror!
It’s been six months since I joined the gym, and still no progress! I’m going there in-person tomorrow to see what’s going on.
What kind of gym do Christians like to go to? A CrossFit gym.
I used to hate working out, but now I find it bar-bell-ic!
What do you call an exercise class for lazy people? Cardio-no!
I tried to join a gym, but it would cost a leg and an arm.
Why did the weightlifter go to the library? To get some good reads!
Did you hear about the gym that specializes in training cats? It’s called Feline Good!
The marathon runner and the cross country runner got into a fight. It was a real running feud.
Why did the exercise equipment break up with its owner? It wasn’t getting enough lift-a time.
What’s a health nut’s favorite way to relax? Meditation, obviously.
I tried to do some sit-ups, but my stomach had a different ab-idea.
Why was the basketball player afraid of doing squats? He was afraid he’d get a slam-dunk in his face!
What do you call a group of runners who refuse to share their water bottles? A running on empty team.
I would do yoga, but it’s just too much downward dog-ness.
How do you know when you’ve reached a fit-ness guru status? When your friends start asking you for workout advice!
I don’t always do burpees, but when I do, I bur-pee heavy.
My trainer told me to do some planks, but I’d rather build one.
Why did the chicken join the gym? To work on its fowl-ness.
I started a new workout routine and now my body’s feeling like a real working class hero.
Why did the fitness instructor quit her job? She just wasn’t feeling the burn anymore.
I tried to do a handstand, but I just kept thinking I was holding the world on my shoulders.
As a lazy person, I’ve found the ultimate exercise: jumping to conclusions.
I recently started doing squats in the gym. Not to get in shape, but to pick up loose change from the floor.
I accidentally dropped my dumbbells on my foot. Now I have a weight problem.
My favorite exercise is a mix of alcoholic and aerobic. It’s called “cork-popping cardio.”
My workout routine is similar to a sandwich – it starts with a warm-up, has some heavy lifting in the middle, and ends with me lying down in exhaustion.
I tried practicing yoga, but downward-facing dog quickly turned into collapsed-puddle-on-the-floor dog.
My gym offers free pizza on Fridays. To think people actually pay to lose weight there.
They say laughter is the best exercise, so I’ve been cracking jokes while eating cake. Double workout!
My idea of a well-rounded workout is spinning in circles until I’m dizzy, then collapsing on the couch.
I’ve been going to the gym regularly for three whole days now. They should really start building my statue.
I accidentally signed up for a marathon, but it was only 26 miles, so no big deal.
I have a strict routine of working out every day – as long as it doesn’t interfere with my nap schedule.
My favorite exercise is called “running late.” I do it every single day.
I used to have a six-pack, but then I traded it in for a keg. Much more practical.
What do you call a lazy gym member? A cardio sloth.
Why did the weightlifter go on a diet? He wanted to gain some self-control.
What do you get when you cross a treadmill with a disco ball? A running joke.
Why do yoga instructors love their job? They get to stretch for a living.
Why don’t gym buffs go to the gym on weekends? They’re too tired of flexing for the week.
How do you know if someone does CrossFit? Just wait, they’ll tell you.
What do you call a panda who loves to lift weights? A buffoon.
Why did the marathon runner quit his job? He couldn’t stand working for a minute longer.
What did the gym say to the athlete who never shows up? “Where have you been? We missed your muscle mass!”
How did the bodybuilder get through the basketball game? With some high-pressure protein shots.
Why did the weights go to Planet Fitness? Because they heard it was a judgment-free zone, and they didn't want to be weighed down by negativity!
Check Out My YouTube Channel CoreniaBug on YouTube! Tons of Dad Joke Videos! More laughs is only one click away.
The dad jokes and pictures were great. Especially reading without a million ads lol crazy
ReplyDeleteOne of the best lists I've seen
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by. For more laughs check out my YouTube Channel, CoreniaBug, for a ton of dad joke videos. Support the channel and keep dad jokes alive. Thank you and have a Fantastic Day!
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